Friday, July 10, 2015

The village idiot of Las Vegas gets dumped by Roxy.

"Jethro, you remind me of this loser boyfriend I had in high school. He was always talking about how he was going to be a big rock star and how I was going to be his girl and all this bullshit that never happened. The only difference between him and you is he was seventeen and hot while you are forty five and look like a refrigerator with a head on it. I am too fucking old nowadays to fall for anymore of this shit." I called Roxy last night because I felt she owed me an explanation about her behavior over the Fourth of July weekend - Be careful what you ask for.

"You want to know something else moron?" I try interrupting but the tactic only enrages her further. "Don't fucking interrupt me why I am talking asshole!" she yells intently, "That's another thing I despise about you. You have no manners whatsoever. Don't ever interrupt me why I am talking Jethro! Do you understand?" I tell her I am sorry and sheepishly ask if I can talk - "Make it fast dip shit. I am getting real fucking tired of this conversation," she replies.

I explain how I have been under a lot of pressure lately and reiterate how much I love and miss her...she interrupts before I can finish. I politely remind her I don't like being interrupted as well...she bellows - "Look, moron, I will interrupt you anytime I feel like it. Besides, you have nothing worthwhile to say. Now I am going to say this one last time. Lose my fucking number!" I sadly agree and then add in haste, "Don't call or text me about getting you a room when you come to town anymore. I will not do it." She sighs angrily after the declaration and pipes - "Don't you worry about it asshole. My days of being your whore are over!"

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