A Trump man in Chinatown.

I called my friend Fred in Arizona today in order to bring him up to speed on Village Idiot Armada Days - (VIAD) which is scheduled for June 22-26 in Las Vegas. We exchange pleasantries for a few minutes and then he says, "I can't believe this country elected a clown like the one we got now. He is so obnoxious," Fred's opinion of  President Trump is that of an incompetent boob who happened to run against a bunch of other incompetent boobs and won. "I feel Mickey Mouse would make a better president than this blowhole. What is it that you think is so great about this guy?"

I have been waiting for someone to ask me why I REALLY like President Trump - "Look," I say intently, "The thing that turns me on with him is his position on how China has been zapping money out of this country left and right and no one is trying to make any money off of them. It's a one way street and I believe he is apt to set a better trade policy with them. I mean it can't get much worse. The trade deficit was three hundred and seventy six billion dollars with them last year. Don't you think it would be a good idea to at least try an reverse it a little?"

We chat a little more about the weather and then I ask, "Do you remember the Chinese restaurant I took you to when you were last in town? You know, the one you said, 'was the best Chinese food you ever had." He answers yes, "Good," I tell him intently, "Because that restaurant and a hundred more in Chinatown are all under my thumb. And let me tell you this with all certainty. Trump is viewed as a businessman in Chinatown, and business is good in Chinatown! One last thing...Chinatown is the gateway to a much, much larger audience. And I am the guy who holds the key!"

Just to bring people up to speed on the last paragraph - a few years ago I was tasked with signing up restaurants for a food delivery site. A few restaurants I signed in Chinatown have been pulling in astronomical numbers for the site. And the truth is they're a hundred other restaurants in Chinatown that are apt to perform - I am the only one who can get them. I reiterated to Fred the sentiment and he tells me - "You sound awfully sure of yourself...I tell him, "It ain't bragging if it's true." I then add, "Just be ready for VIAD. I will be demonstrating a number of dynamic and emerging trends." I then yell - "Trump!" He does not reciprocate the statement.