Sunday, March 11, 2018

the homeless comedian...

There's this homeless guy who hangs out on the corner. The two of us share a running gag. Every time I see him I yell, "Trump!" - He reciprocates with - "Hitler!" - Today was no different:

"Trumppp!" I added additional vigor to my usual greeting. He in turn does the same - "Hitlerrrr!"- We share the usual laugh and he says - "Your guy is losing it. Did you see him the other day at some schmucks campaign rally? It's like he is auditioning for an HBO stand up gig." Here we go again with his politics. It's okay. I can take small doses - "The baboon pulled the biggest con job in history by getting elected president. The con is going to be over soon when Mueller tosses his ass out of office." It's the same old song & dance with my friend. Usually I give my spiel about the economy and Trump's willingness to tackle trade deficiencies with the likes of China & such. I decide to give it a break and change the subject to something less irritating.

"In a couple of days I will be at the Royal's training camp with a beer in one hand and a hot dog in the other. Bute is coming to town Tuesday for a week. Looking forward to it." -- "Is he the guy you told me won eight grand when the Astros won the series?" My homeless friend hails from College Station. He is a big fan of all teams Texas - "That's him," I reply, "He is Mr. Houston. When he comes to town we have much to discuss."

We chat about the weather for a minute and then he says - "Not your first idol Trump. I'm talking about your second idol Steve Wynn now. He is no longer relevant to the strip anymore." I have told him a number of times Larry Bird is my idol. Not Donald Trump, not Steve Wynn - I tell him again - I then add - "Don't kid yourself about things. He may no longer be a presence on the strip, but he is still plenty relevant. And stop calling him my idol." He laughs and says - "Don't lie to me boy. I know you are the president of the Steve Wynn fan club. Everyone knows Trump and him are your role models." I've suggested stand up comedy to my friend on a number of occasions. I figure it will give him something to do besides standing at the corner all day - "Maybe I will," he tells me after I suggest it again.

Our time winds down and I prepare to exit. Before I do he says one last thing - "When your buddy Bute comes to town bring him by the corner. I would like to meet him. Also, don't deny the fact that Donald Trump & Steve Wynn are your idols." I smile and remind him yet again - "Larry Bird is my idol, not those guys," we then bump fists. After the gesture I walk away.


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