I was chatting with uncle Ned again today - "You want to know something moron? This Roxy chick you keep talking about isn't even real. Is she?" - We've had this discussion numerous times - "She's real alright! She's a professional and discretion is important to her. I have to respect that if things are going to continue between us. It's how girls like her work." - He then starts in on one of his rants - "You mean to tell me in all this time you haven't got one picture to share with me," adding, "Joel's never seen her; your dad has never seen her; Cammie has never seen her; I think she is a figment of your imagination." - It grows cumbersome repeating the same thing over & over to no avail - I do it any way..."Look," I say with a little more emphasis than usual - "She put it to me lightly & I will never forget it as long as I live. We were at the Palm's a while back and I was getting ready to leave after one of our trysts - 'If you want to keep seeing this again, you better do as I tell you.' After the statement she drops her robe. Now I got one foot out the door & she pulls me back in and says, 'Do you understand what I am saying Jethro? Don't mess things up between us.'- And then it was a quickie for the road. It's imperative I be discreet & obey her wishes. I love her too much to do otherwise." - He still doesn't believe me...I don't really care.
"Tell me about the time you would pick up chicks because you looked like John Belushi." Uncle Ned was a dead ringer for Belushi in the 70's - "It was the 70's back then," he proclaims in a nostalgic tone "Belushi was the man and I just so happened to resemble him. Thank goodness I didn't turn out like him," he adds with a laugh - "So how did it work? Would they just line up back in the day and tell you that you looked like him," I add with a snicker - "That's pretty much how it worked," he bellows, "I would go to a club in Houston & within five minutes ten people would tell me how much I resembled him. The next thing you know we are back at my place and the fun is starting to begin."
"What about the Golden Knights? Have you jumped on the bandwagon yet?" - Their inaugural season has been one for the history books. The Stanley Cup Finals begin Monday night on the strip. The whole town is abuzz about it - "Every other person who comes into 7-11 is wearing either a VGK shirt or hat. Even my buddy James jumped on the bandwagon. He put a Knight's decal on his ride." I then ask Ned if he is much of a hockey fan - "You better believe it! When I went to school in Maine they had a sensational program. One of the best in the country at the time. I know a thing or two about hockey."
Our conversation comes to a close but not before he makes one last smart remark about politics - "It's still hard to believe a nephew of mine would be ignorant enough to support a moron like Trump. To think this guy is your idol is nauseating to me." For some reason or another everyone thinks Trump is my idol. He's not! I 'pay attention' to him because of his views on trade with China. I reiterate the sentiment to Ned & he says - "Whatever you say Trump lover." - He then hangs the phone up without saying goodbye.
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