The village idiot of Las Vegas runs into his favorite crack whore.

If you walk up and down my neighborhood you will be apt to find a cornucopia of life's unsavory characters. Gang banger's, bums, bag ladies, drug dealers...you name it - It's there:

"Hey honey - where have you been? How are you doing sweetie?" Last night I made a trek to the corner store - and wouldn't you know -- my favorite crack whore in North Las Vegas was camped out in front. "Mary," I say with a wide grin, "I have been doing Okay. What have you been up to lately?" Mary, or Scary Mary as she is known around the neighborhood, is a sight for sore eyes.

"One of these days you are going to be my boyfriend," she tells me with a crack infested smile, she then adds, "How come a nice guy like you is living in a shit hole neighborhood like this? What's a matter Jethro? Can't you find one of these pretty Las Vegas girls to take you in?" Mary and I have become friends of sort. She accosted me a while back about her services (which I politely declined). Nevertheless, I still like her. It's folks like her who add much of the seasoning to North Las Vegas.

"Mary, my love. Have you been behaving yourself?" I say with a wide smile again, "Where have you been? I heard you were in the slammer. That was the word floating around the neighborhood." -- she looks at me with sunken eyes, laughs, coughs and says, "Yeah, I had a couple of warrants and they picked me up for solicitation a few weeks ago. I just got out the other day," - fresh out of jail and back to business...that's Mary.

We exchange a few more pleasantries and then I open the shop door to enter - she says, "Do you think you could get me a candy bar or some cookies? I am kind of hungry." -- How could I say no to a face like hers? Besides, everyone should eat. So I walk in, grab my beer, grab Mary some cookies, pay for them, chat with Pedro, the cashier, for a moment and walk out. Mary is already hitting up another guy.

"Here you go darling," I say as I nudge her on the arm with a pack of Nutter Butter's, "I will see you around. Try to stay out of trouble," she grabs the cookies, looks at me again with her sunken eyes and says - "One of these days you are going to be my boyfriend and we will have a charmed life. You are my Prince Charming."