I've known Mad Max from Kansas - many, many years. More than I will ever admit...Anyhoo, I started thinking about the anarchist son of a bitch today, so I called - "I was wondering if I was ever going to hear from you again boy. Are you getting ready for the Apocalypse?" Mad Max has always been paranoid. It is worse than ever nowadays - "Do you know what boy?" The gruffness in his voice unmistakable - "Your idol is finally getting shit together. He is going to figure out the border. The military should have been there years ago. Trump has the balls to make it happen." - Larry Bird is my idol, not Donald Trump. I remind him of such & he says - "Shut your hole boy! Everyone knows Trump is your idol."
Mad Max owns more guns than Walmart. When I lived in Kansas we would always hang out at his place. There is a gun (literally) under every pillow - "Got to be ready for when the shit house catches fire son," is one of his logic's. Let's just put it this way. I would not suggest a home invasion attempt at Mad Max's - "Have you added anymore guns to your collection lately?" I ask with a laugh. "No," he tells me with a laugh of his own, "I don't feel the need to buy anymore now that your idol is a staunch supporter of the Second Amendment."
We give the guns & politics a rest - "Mad Max - Are you still with your lady?" He's been dating the same gal for years, but they've never married - "Yeah, she's still around. We haven't killed each other yet." -- "When are you going to officially make her Mrs. Mad Max?" Every time I ask he says the same thing - "Why go and fuck things up by getting married? If it ain't broke don't fix it." He's been married a time or two - "It made me gun shy after the third one went sour on me. The last thing I need is a fourth ex wife. The gal I'm with now shares the same philosophy as me. So it works well."
Our time comes to a close, but not before he gives me one last bit of his craziness - "I know all the prepping I do for the collapse is a big joke to you." He's a 'prepper' - For those of you not familiar with the phrase - Look it up - "But I am here to tell you boy. When the shit house catches fire, and it will, I will be the one who survives. You and all the other masses will be the first to capitulate." I've heard his spiel before, so I interrupt about a third of the way through - "I got to go good buddy. Blue Bloods is getting ready to start." I then hang the phone up without saying goodbye.
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