Thursday, August 30, 2012

Another day in the life of the village idiot of Las Vegas..

Chatting with my uncle Ned the other day, and the discussion turned to women. My beliefs, Las Vegas has the most beautiful women in the world, he doesn't agree. Now, I've got to admit a few things about my Uncle Ned..In his day? Extremely well traveled, schooled in Europe. He used to tell me that Europe was his backyard..Nowadays? Kansas is his backyard.

"I get it! But, what you don't seem to understand! Las Vegas isn't the only place where you can find a ton of 10's! Spend some time over in Europe! I once met a Parisian girl who looked like Claudia Schieffer! And she was into this Kansas boy. You should have seen her friends! They were all runway ready! So don't tell me that I don't know anything about beautiful women! I know plenty!" Uncle Ned doesn't liked being called out on things..So when it happens? He tends to get upset.."Jesus, settle down before you have a fucking heart attack..All I'm saying! Uncle Ned, the women in Las Vegas are absolutely insane. Not only that! You can hardly walk down the street without seeing one..Especially in the area I live in!"

The complex I live at in Las Vegas reminds me of a Melrose Place on steroids! If your a single, heterosexual, red blooded, god fearing, boy from Kansas? You can't help but love the hot tub at my complex. Last night, I couldn't sleep, and since the pool area is open 24 hours, I decided to take a late night dip. As I'm sitting in the pool, I notice a nice young lady walk into the pool area. She then takes off her sundress to reveal her bikini clad body. She looks at me and says.."Hi, how are you? How's the water?" Looking at this girl damn near made my heart stop! She was blond, 22?23? WHEW WHEE! When my heart stopped racing. I answered her like this.."Uhh..Uhh..The water isn't that bad, jump in." She looks at me and says.."Good idea."..After she dives into the water and resurfaces, I ask her name and how long she has lived at the complex. "My name is Sasha and I moved in a month ago." One of the great things about Las Vegas? And Sasha serves as yet another example! Your never going to run out of opportunities to meet beautiful women in this town.

We chat briefly, and then she tells me she has to go.."It was nice meeting you Ron, but I've got to go." It must be my mid western drawl, or the girls I introduce myself to aren't paying that much attention? My name is actually Rob, not Ron, Rod, Jack or however they butcher it..Oh well, one of these days they will get it right..Anyways, I told her this.."It was nice meeting you as well. I'll see you around." I decided to call it a night after she left, and when I got back to my apartment? My clock said 3:00 AM..Now, I want any heterosexual guy to think about this for a moment. How many of you would be jealous? If I told you that I could walk down to my pool and see a girl that looks like a Playboy centerfold at 3 in the morning? Like I said.."Ain't no town like Las Vegas!"

I like to end every post of mine with a thought I'm having..Call it the village idiot thought of the day.."I've said this once or twice, and I'll say it..AGAIN..If your looking for beautiful women to Guerrilla market for you? My research tells me that Las Vegas could be a place like no other!"












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