stripper sandwiches...

A twenty minute Zoom session with my favorite pansexual shrink over the weekend focuses on my friend Legend:

"Legend has been reading about our sessions Lacey. He finds you intriguing."

"Why is that Mr. Astle."

"It's your sexuality. It's appealing to him."

"My sexuality is appealing to many men Mr. Astle. Why should I care what Legend thinks?"

"He's confused about the difference between pansexual & bisexual. He says all the pansexual talk in the blog reminds him of a stripper girlfriend from the nineties."

"This is the guy who caught the winning pass in the state title game when you were in high school."

"Yes Ma'am, that's Legend."

"Why do I remind this pervert of his stripper girlfriend from the nineties?"

"He said his girlfriend would fuck him silly & afterwards she would call over another girl & he would have a stripper sandwich."

"What's a stripper sandwich?"

"A three way Lacey,"

"Oh, I see, go on with the story."

"His girlfriend back then is a bisexual, but in today's world she would be labeled pansexual is what he thinks. The point is you remind him of her. He's fresh out of his third marriage & looking to turn the clock back twenty years. It's younger women he desires. You & the fiancee might be a good fit is his underlying thought."

Stripper girlfriends & his thirst for three ways arouses her:

"Tell me a naughty one about him Rob. He sounds like an Alpha...unlike you.

"A naughty one, hmmm...okay Lacey, I got a naughty one for you. Legend was known for his cunnilingus skills. One night we are standing at the bar & a certain lady approaches him. Women approached him all the time, so it wasn't anything new. I hadn't seen this one before & she is smoking hot. Any way, they toss back a few drinks & this babe looks him square in the eyes and says, 'Stacey told me you know how to eat pussy. Is that true?"

"Oh my goodness, she actually said that to him," interrupting before I finish the story, "What did he do?"

"I won't ever forget this Lacey. He looked her straight in the eyes & said, 'You are about to find out for yourself bitch."

We chat about a few mandates & then she suggests:

"You should invite Legend to one of our therapy sessions. He sounds interesting. I'd like to meet him. Tell him more about what it is to be pansexual & polyamorous."

"Legends my age. Don't forget that."

"Doesn't matter the age Mr. Astle. A polyamorous pansexual wants what it wants."

"Okay, I'll ask him. It's going to be weird having him Zoom in on my therapy sessions. Is there any way I could pass on the information to him & he could contact you independent of our sessions? I'd feel like a third wheel."

"Nope," is her stern reply, "I want you to introduce me to this man. Set it up & get back to me."