"My chick bad, my chick hood. My chick do stuff that your chick wish she could. My chick bad, badder than yours. My chick do stuff that I can't even put in words."
Ludacris - My Chick Bad
Last night I was sitting in my room all by lonesome when my phone started beeping. I picked it up and discovered that Roxy had sent me a video file through SnapChat. I have never used SnapChat before, so it took a few minutes to figure out how it works. Once I did, how do I say this? Well, let's put it this way. It was the best Valentine's gift this white boy from Kansas could ever ask for.
At the beginning of the video, Roxy is sitting on a bed with a night gown on. As a matter of fact, it was the same gown she was wearing when we spent the night together at The Palm's. Anyways, she then says this. "Jethro, since I don't have a Valentine this year and I know you don't have one either. Plus the fact that you're so adorable, well, I thought I would give you a little Valentine's present." After her statement, she then stands up, moves the camera back a few feet, adjusts the focus and says, "Happy Valentine's Day Jethro."
It's times like these when I am sure Roxy is the girl for me. After her greeting, she promptly drops the robe she is wearing to reveal her naked body. The site of Roxy's nude and statuesque body will drive any man insane, let alone some dumb hillbilly from Kansas. She then stands there for ten seconds or so posing and smiling and then says this. "Jethro, I hope you enjoyed the present. I have to go now." She blows a kiss into the camera and the video ends.
After I pushed my eyes back into my head I promptly look back down at my phone with every intention of viewing the video again. Turns out I was only able to view the file once before SnapChat automatically deletes it from the browser. Anyways, I decided to send Roxy a text and thank her for the present. About an hour later I get a text back saying, "You're welcome. Have a great Valentine's Day."
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